@heatherbridgham we actually get this question a lot, a jacket that is both waterproof and not "noisy" or "crunchy." Unfortunately, part of the noice/crunch is a result of the technical fabric used to make a jacket waterproof. A softer/quieter jacket, like a softshell, will offer water resistance but typically not be fully waterproof.
With that said, here are a few models of waterproof rain jackets that we'd consider to be on the softer/quieter side:
- REI Co-op XeroDry GTX - this is just a shell (no insulation) and on the quieter side
- Mountain Hardwear Exposure 2 - also just a shell and on the quieter side
- Mammut Heritage HS Hooded - also just a shell and on the quieter side
- REI Stormhenge - while not a 3-in-1, this is a warm, waterproof jacket that is not "crunchy"
The majority of the 3-in-1 jackets we carry are designed for skiing/snowboarding, which you didn't mention. You can certainly wear these jackets around town, and their outer shell is often "quiet," however they will include ski-specific features like a powder skirt and a helmet-compatible hood that may be unnecessary/undesirable for non-ski adventures.
Another option for warm and waterproof is to pick a shell (as mentioned above) and pair it with either a down layer or synthetic layer underneath, effectively creating your own 3-in-1! We've got a helpful article on how to choose an insulated jacket for more ideas and information. Hope this helps!